David

Lord, your heavy hand demanding justice seems cruel and I know it's just because my ways are not your ways and my thoughts are not your thoughts.  Show me grace in the Old Testament. I know it's there. Help me to see it.  I continue in 2 Samuel reading of David's life. There's a story that stays with me.  David went to talk to Shimei ,  a friend of his son, Absalom who was trying to take over his kingdom. That alone was breaking his heart. When David and his servants arrived, Shimei came out  cursing and throwing stones at David, accusing him of being a murderer, which he was. David's soldiers offered to kill the man cursing him. David said, "No, God told him to curse me." David knew the man was right. He was all those things  (a murderer), and He knew there were consequences for what he had done. He owned it. David and his men walked away heading toward  home. Shimei didn't let them go, he followed David cursing him along the way, continually throwing stones at him- at the king! The men continued to walk wearily.  David never defended himself or made excuses. He thought maybe the Lord would bless him because of the mistreatment of Shimei all the while reminding himself God told the man to curse him. David never pointed out Shimei's sin to him, making  him aware of the hypocrisy. David walked. He was exhausted. He was a man after God's own heart.

Sometimes God sends someone to remind us of our sin and in that person's brokenness he forgets his own sinful state. It's not our place to be defensive. Own it.  It's not our place to convict. " Yeah, well you...."  Keep walking, maybe God will bless you because of their cursing.

The legalist is always harder on other people than he is on himself, so he can feel better about his own state, but the Spirit-led Christian demands more of himself than he does of others so he can glorify God in his humility because he knows God is his standard.

Conflict between Christians

Conflict between a Christian and non Christian is easy- you show them grace and respond with  truth in love with a humble spirit. Why is it so difficult when conflict arises between two believers? The response should be the same. What if one demonstrates these qualities while the other reacts in anger and pride, unwilling to be a part of restoration? I think it's because we want justice. It's easier to show mercy toward someone who doesn't know better and demand justice from someone who does.  It's not wrong to be angry when justice is not brought about. God demands justice and we are made in His image. It is our responsibility to live at peace with all as much as it depends on us, which means sometimes we do our part and it's not possible. This is when we need to remember that God is our avenger who brings about justice, but He is also a God of mercy. We have to let it go at that point.

I'm struggling through this now. Not with anger toward another person. I know he felt he dealt with the situation properly. He didn't. He didn't deal with the problem when it became a problem for him. He let it go for a long time and held on to the anger and resentment. When he finally did address the issue out of necessity he was filled with pride and lacking in grace. It was as though his imagination engulfed his humility and ran away with him. I prayed before I responded . I owned my part and apologize. It's not the conflict that bothers me, because there will always be conflict at some point and it's not his sin that bothers me because I sin all the time. It's the inability to have restoration. I feel sorry for people that throw away friendships so easily when there could easily be restoration. if it wasn't for pride. I had been praying and reading my Bible and God told me," You did what you could to restore peace, You did not repay evil for evil, you did not tell him to get the beam out of his eye, (even though I knew you wanted to), you are not trying to avenge yourself, and you rejoice in the hope of restoration in the future. You can never  bring about justice until one's anger is made right and that is beyond your control when it is not you. Are you trying to gain the approval of ME or man? Be at peace.