The Bahama Emergency Children's Hostel- My experience with the orphans

A week before our vacation we came up with the idea of visiting and volunteering at an orphanage. We knew Nassau was a poor island and in good conscience I couldn't enjoy the beauty and and luxury while ignoring the poverty that lay just beyond. I pulled up a list of orphanages on the computer Saturday morning and Jason contacted one and got a quick response from Nakita from the Bahama Emergency Children's Hostel. We were surprised how quickly things fell in place for us to go. The night before we were to port, the cruise director made several announcements about being careful venturing out on our own. We were warned to not wear any flashy jewelry, which was not a problem. We were nervous about taking a cab and the warnings didn't help. We arrived in Nassau the next morning, gathered our back pack and two plastic Walmart bags full of towels and socks for the kids, grabbed our passports and headed off the ship. We walked past all the tourists and the ship excursions over to a group of men to find someone to take us to the orphanage. They asked us where we wanted to go assuming we were headed to the beach and were eager to take us. We could tell our destination caught them off guard. We told them we wanted to go to the Children's Hostel and a tall, strong man stepped out of the group as if emerging from the shadows and said, "I know where that is. Follow me."  He walked briskly. It was hard to keep up as we walked farther and farther away from safety and security. He wore a black winter hat and dark sunglasses. It was warm and rainy that morning. We got to his van. I saw the word "taxi" very small on the outside. We reluctantly got in and the doors closed. We were quite nervous and tried to talk to ease the tension, but he clearly didn't want to talk to us. He was on his phone trying to get a hold of someone. We felt as if we were in a very dangerous situation and were completely at his mercy as we rode farther inland not knowing if he was taking us where we wanted to go or somewhere else. We finally saw the hostel and were so relieved. We asked him how much we owed him and it was nearly $50, all the cash we had. It was as though he intuitively knew exactly what was in our wallet and took all of it. We didn't know how we were going to get back to port, but we reached our destination and it was like a beacon in a dark place. They welcomed us in with such joy and warmth. We got to meet Nakita and she hugged us as if she knew us and was so grateful we had come. Here in the South there is a culture of morality. The difference between the saved and unsaved is blurry. In Nassau it was as night and day. We told Nakita about our taxi experience and gave her the things we brought for her and then she took us to see the children. As soon as I walked in the door a little boy's arm wrapped itself around my leg and refused to let go as I walked. I knew he would be the one I would love and want to take home, but instead leave and probably never see again. He wanted me to pick him up and every time I tried to set him down he said, "no". I obliged. Eventually he did get down and started playing with Jason. Finally wearing himself out he snuggled into Jason's lap tried to sleep. His name was James. Half the kids there had cerebral palsy. I don't know what the stats are for that disability, but I know that 90% of down syndrome babies are aborted because the parents don't think they can handle it or they think they will have a poor quality of life. I don't know what will happen to all the disabled orphans when they age out of the system. If we are truly pro-life how should we as Christians respond to these orphans with disability? I don't know. It's a tough question to wrestle with. We played with the children. They were all in a small room. One was playing with a brush and a broken comb another was holding a piece of plastic bread that was broken. They had a lot of books and a tv that had Tom and Jerry playing. The couches they sat on were so worn you could see the wooden frame. After a few hours of playing, it was time to say good bye to James and the other children. We could tell he didn't want us to leave. In a way it seemed cruel to play with him and show affection and then walk away. When they were done cleaning the facility they showed us around. It was very clean and simple. There weren't many toys. I would say fewer than 10 that we saw and there are 30 kids living there. Everything they had was so worn out. Nakita arranged for their personal bus driver, Mr. Williams to take us back to port which was such a blessing. We asked him to take us to a bank because we wanted to pay him something, but the ATM wouldn't work. The director of the orphanage rode with us. She had to stop at each of the schools to get permission for the kids to miss school to eat on one of the cruise ships. She didn't want them to miss out on that experience. So we got a personal tour and got to listen to Mr Williams talk about God, the culture and the children. He told us about the big Christmas parade called the Junkanoo that they do every year and how grand it is. I wish we could have seen it! He talked about how thankful he is that he can never go hungry because there are fruits and nuts in the trees in everyone's yard. He talked about how we are all equal and we belong to God so he can walk down the street and not be afraid. He talked about how children are a blessing and how the Bible is all about loving God and loving others and meeting each others needs out of our abundance. Mr. Williams was a treasure. He dropped us off near the port in the tourist area which was a very different Nassau than what we had seen. We went back on to the ship with much less that we had left with which was much different than everyone else. Over the last few years we've been wanting to get involved as a family in a charity. The ones in the Greenville area are so well taken care of by all the local churches that I didn't really feel like I was needed, we definitely feel like we can make a difference at the Children's Hostel and will continue to do what we can for them. I can't wait to go back! God calls us all to do something. What is He calling you to do?

Americam Dream or Amazing Life

"And let us not grow weary of doing good, for in due season we will reap, if we do not give up.So then, as we have opportunity, let us do good to everyone, and especially to those who are of the household of faith....For we are his workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand, that we should walk in them." -Apostle Paul

I read these verses earlier this week and I've been thinking on them since. It amazes me how God thought us up in His heart and created us. We belong to Him completely. He prepared good works for us. He has this amazing life all planned out for each of us. I wonder how many of us give that up in pursuing the American Dream. I wonder if we value comfort and safety more than we should and it causes us to forfeit the good works that He has prepared for us. In the beginning of Christianity there were twelve disciples and they turned the world upside down. God doesn't call all of us to plant churches, be a foster parent, care for the homeless, preach, etc, but He calls us all to do something.

"Life begins at the end of your comfort zone."

The Faith of a Child

"And they were bringing children to him that he might touch them, and the disciples rebuked them. But when Jesus saw it, he was indignant and said to them, “Let the children come to me; do not hinder them, for to such belongs the kingdom of God. Truly, I say to you, whoever does not receive the kingdom of God like a child shall not enter it.” And he took them in his arms and blessed them, laying his hands on them."   Mark 10:13-16

 We tend to think of child like faith as very submissive and in a way apathetic. A blind trust and lack of concern. Is this the kind of Faith Jesus is talking about? Children are notorious for asking questions, more specifically "Why" questions. They (usually ) don't ask  out of disbelief, contempt, or skepticism, but they are always confident that we as a parents have the right answer. They are inquisitive. They want to learn and understand. Sometimes we can explain grown up things on a child's level, sometimes we can't. Sometimes we choose not to because it would be too great a burden.  A couple years ago there was a shooting at an elementary school and kindergartners were killed. I had a kindergartner that year. I choose to be silent. It was unnecessary information that would have caused too much stress. The next day I took him to school. It was a normal day for him and the other children, but not for me and not for his teachers. I'm glad God stays silent sometimes. His silence is grace protecting us from burdens too great for us to bear.

"For my thoughts are not your thoughts,neither are your ways my ways, declares the Lord. For as the heavens are higher than the earth,so are my ways higher than your ways,and my thoughts than your thoughts." Isaiah 55:8-9

Our children know a mere shadow of terrorism and ISIS. It reminds me of how we know a shadow of all the battles of demons and angels all around us, but we never give it much thought. 

"He said, “Do not be afraid, for those who are with us are more than those who are with them.”  Then Elisha prayed and said, “O Lord, please open his eyes that he may see.” So the Lord opened the eyes of the young man, and he saw, and behold, the mountain was full of horses and chariots of fire all around Elisha."- 2 Kings 6:16-17

Maybe this child like faith isn't passive, maybe it's active always asking questions, always learning and always trusting. Sometimes He answers our questions, sometimes He stays silent, and sometimes He smiles and says, " Wait until you're grown and you'll see."


"Such knowledge is too wonderful for me; it is high; I cannot attain it." - Psalm 139:6

Equality Without Communism

"Though He was rich , yet for your sakes He became poor, that you through His poverty might become rich." 2 Cor 8:9

Through Christ's poverty we not only receive redemption, but we become rich in forgiveness, love, grace, peace, compassion, etc.

"Your abundance may supply their lack, that their abundance also may supply your lack-that there may be equality." 2 Cor 8:13

I finished studying 2 Corinthians. I've read this verse many times and always think of it in terms of money, but the Holy Spirit keeps it in my mind and I continually meditate and the meaning becomes so much more. It's giving our time to someone who is lacking, by preparing a meal, or babysitting. It's dropping everything to pick someone up when their car breaks down. It's providing a loving, stable home for a child whose parents  can't. It's choosing to be a surrogate for a couple who lacks the ability to be pregnant with their own child. It's helping someone move, use our truck, or fix something in their house. It's giving food out of the abundance of our gardens or giving someone a bag of clothes our kids have outgrown. It's giving our van away because someone needs it. It's providing a calm, listening spirit to someone who is overwhelmed with the direction life has suddenly taken. It's being an encouragement to one who wants to give up. It's being strong for the weak. It's love put into action.

"We have the ability to love because He first loved us."  We build relationships with a listening ear waiting to hear of a need that we can meet. We act out of love because of the abundant grace we receive through Christ and live out a picture of the Gospel without even realizing that's what we're doing.

A Question for Christians

I'm married and have kids. It's all I ever wanted and I love my family. I really do want everyone who wants that to be able to have it. I imagine being gay is really difficult. Maybe you feel like everyone either loves you or hates you. Like everyone is judging YOU based on sexual preference,something you have no control over, instead of really getting to know you. Maybe you feel really guarded. I would. Honestly, if I wasn't a Christian I would be all for marriage equality. But, I am not my own authority on what is right or wrong. That would be putting myself in the place of God. I can't ignore Scripture that makes me uncomfortable. I can't interpret the Bible through the eyes of my culture. I will submit to the the Bible rather than make the Bible submit to me. I understand how people who don't believe the Bible are rejoicing in the court's ruling. I get it. But, I don't understand why Christians are. I understand loving and accepting people right where they are because that's the way God loves us. I understand celebrating less bullying and hate and embracing more love. I'm ashamed how some Christians have treated the gay lesbian community in the name of Christ. It's appalling. We SHOULD celebrate more love. One of the main themes of the Bible is loving God and loving others. All life demands love and respect because all life is made in God's image. It seems like you're celebrating sin and that's where you loose me.  I'm not trying to be argumentative. I really just want to understand your perspective. Please educate me. Maybe I'm missing something.

Romans 1:26-27 For this reason God gave them up to vile passions. For even their women exchanged the natural use for what is against nature. Likewise also the men, with men committing what is shameful, and receiving in themselves the penalty of their error which was due.

1 Corinthians 6:9-11
Don't you realize that those who do wrong will not inherit the Kingdom of God? Don't fool yourselves. Those who indulge in sexual sin, or who worship idols, or commit adultery, or are male prostitutes, or practice homosexuality, or are thieves, or greedy people, or drunkards, or are abusive, or cheat people-none of these will inherit the Kingdom of God. Some of you were once like that. But you were cleansed; you were made holy; you were made right with God by calling on the name of the Lord Jesus Christ and by the Spirit of our God.

 1 Timothy 1:8-10
Now we know that the law is good, if one uses it lawfully, understanding this, that the law is not laid down for the just but for the lawless and disobedient, for the ungodly and sinners, for the unholy and profane, for those who strike their fathers and mothers, for murderers, the sexually immoral, men who practice homosexuality, enslavers, liars, perjurers, and whatever else is contrary to sound doctrine .


There are also several reference in the OT. This just doesn't seem like a gray issue to me. It seems quite clear. Do you think these particular verses just aren't relevant or do you interpret them a different way? I just can't in good conscience celebrate something the Bible calls sin. I love my children, but I wouldn't celebrate their greed or dishonesty. We can love people even when we disagree with them. I don't agree with some of the decisions my kids have made, but that has not changed my love for them in any way. I don't even agree with all the decisions I've made! Have you studied the Scripture on the matter and prayed and stand in confidence before God on the position you've taken? I'm not trying to be confrontational and I'm not trying to change your position.  You intrigue me and I am truly trying to understand you and see things from your perspective.

Sandra Dee Turns Bad Ass

Ok, not really, but I did recently get a tattoo. I'm hesitant to share this because I do not want to boast in my liberty without regard to how it will affect other people, but this is about what God is doing in my life and that I do feel compelled to share. This was a process of five + years of listening to the voice of the Holy Spirit instead of the voice of legalism. I studied what the Bible said on the topic, prayed a lot, talked to people and listened to God. Shouldn't all decisions be made in that manner? Music can be redeemed, art forms can be redeemed, even we can be redeemed.

I chose a cross because all of Christianity hangs on the resurrection. That was the moment of truth and there is just not enough I can say about what those two lines representing the cross encompass. The fulfillment of the OT, God keeping His promise to Adam and Eve, love, grace, freedom from sin and the wrath of God. I chose the fish symbol because that was how the early Christians recognized each other in the beginning of the church. One would draw half the fish on the sand and if the other person was a Christian he would draw the other half. Sometimes they would carve the fish symbol onto their houses or doors so other Christians would know it was refuge during times of persecution when Christianity began. I wanted to identify with them and honor them. In the Greek the acronym stands for Jesus Christ, Son of God, Savior. The fish swims from right to left to represent Jesus leaving righteousness (right)  to defeat sin (left).
I was nervous to get this done only because it was a new experience. I was very excited and at peace knowing God approved of what I was about to do.
At my former church a Sunday School teacher told my free spirited daughter not to draw on herself because "Jesus doesn't like tattoos". Well, Jesus likes this one.

Reasons
1. I truly felt led by the Spirit
2. Anyone who sees this will identify me with Christianity.
3. This is a way for me to demonstrate that I am not ashamed of the Gospel of Christ
4. It was something I wanted to experience
5. It gave me opportunity to get out of my comfort zone.
6. It broke down prejudices that my children had. 

When Treasure Becomes Clutter

"Take heed and beware of covetousness, for one's life does not consist in the abundance of the things he possesses." Luke 12:15

I've been trying to live a more minimalistic life. To me, that means living with what I need and love and being content with less stuff. I actually enjoy sorting through closets and organizing and if you came to my house you would not see someone who has a problem with clutter.
 As I sort and throw away, give, and donate, I realize how much I have that is just taking up space and invading the peace of the house. Sorting through the kitchen and pantry is pretty easy and so is throwing away all the outdated medicine, and unmatched socks. I go through my baby's clothes and even though she still fits into them I give half her outfits away. I do laundry every other day and she has more than she needs. So, I pick out a few of my favorites and plan to give the rest to a friend who just had a baby.  I go through my jewelry box, which is a complete mess. I throw most of it away and give a couple things to my girls. I start going through my clothes and then I get irritated with myself. I place clothes that I have never worn or worn only a couple times into a bag for my niece and think of all the money represented in those items and how that money could have helped with more important, valuable things. I feel very repentant and angry with my poor stewardship and self-worship. I pull down my basket of scarves from the shelf in my closet. I never thought myself  a very materialistic person, but when I look at some of my treasures/ clutter it's hard to put them in the bag to give away. I am strangely attached to them. They're pretty and I want to keep them even though I never wear them. I find value in them. Then, I realize how covetous I am. I put them in the bag.

I've gone through my house before and purged, but it's never had such a personal impact on me. The more I packed up the more I saw that needed to go. "For where your treasure is, there will your heart be also." I could see where my money was going, my family's money, and it revealed the priorities of my heart. It's about living intentionally, and having things that serve a purpose. It's a process, but I feel the peace coming back into the house.

"Every time you spend money, you're casting a vote for the kind of world you want."- Anna Lappe

Transparancy

I think sometimes in the name of being an encouragement we can have the opposite effect.  We post pictures and write blogs about our well behaved, beautifully dressed children.  We never complain and always have a positive perspective on everything. We tell people we don't have it all together, but social media speaks louder than words. I've found the people that have been the greatest encouragement to me have been those who relate to my struggles and deficiencies. We often demand transparency in others but pride prevents us from demonstrating that quality in our own lives.

Healing in His Wings

 Malachi 4:2-But for you who fear my name, the sun of righteousness shall rise with healing in its wings. You shall go out leaping like calves from the stall.

This verse is a prophecy about the coming Messiah. The word translated to wings is also the same word as tassels. The Jewish people wore tassels on the hems of their garments. Jesus would have worn that type of garment. The lady with the issue of blood that touched the hem of His garment to be healed knew the prophecy from Malachi and recognized Jesus as the Messiah and knew He would have healing in his wings- tassels- hem of His garment. That's the faith that healed her. The faith that He was the Messiah.

Just Look at Me and Listen

My eleven year old daughter has to get her blood drawn. I listen as she screams, "Anything but this! No, please don't! I just want it to be a normal day!" I think,"she doesn't know what real suffering is."  I tell her it's for her good. I try to explain it to her. I tell her it will happen so fast. It's only a few seconds of her life. I'm frustrated that she won't look at me. She won't hear what I'm trying to say to her. Her eyes are on the needle and her thoughts on the anticipation of pain. Based on her life experience and eleven year old knowledge of the world, getting a shot is the worst thing that can happen to her.

I think about my fears- cancer, terrorism, death of a child, Christian persecution. "Lord, please anything but this! Make it stop. The suffering is too great!" He smiles at me with compassion and thinks, "Child, you don't know what real suffering is. You don't understand how this all works together for your good." He says, "Yes, there will be pain, but the suffering is so short compared to eternity." He is frustrated that I won't keep my eyes on Him. "Why won't you listen to my words and find comfort?"

I Love You More Than Chocolate- My Experience With Lent

I always thought lent was a predominately Catholic observance done in order gain favor with God. I thought of it as a "work of righteousness".   I was actually brought up around spiritual leaders who made fun of those with the ashes on their foreheads and those who participated in Lent. After moving down South I learned that other Christian denominations participated, but still didn't really know what it meant. It seems like most people give up chocolate or FB. I wondered if it was more of an act of self control and will power or if it could be a sacrifice offering to God done out of love.  The more I researched it and observed it in people I knew the more it weighed on my heart to observe it myself. I love Easter. It's the holiest of all holidays. All of Christianity rests on the resurrection. I wanted to celebrate Easter in a deeper more worshipful way. Maybe participating in Lent was that way. I asked questions and talked to people and did research on line to figure out how Lent could be worship. I had 2 problems standing in my way. 1. If people knew that I was participating I would become self righteous and 2. If I give something up I would likely replace it with something else just as binding.  I thought this was really beautiful -" the act of giving up will naturally cause you to go to God when you face temptation, whether it be money, time, or food. Think about something binding YOU. Commit to change and when you are tempted, ask God to remove the temptation and trust in the Holy Spirit. It's a beautiful way to lean on God and deny self."

It's Feb 18. The traditional first day of Lent. I want to do this and God has been laying this on my heart for two years and He gave me not only one, but two things to give up. I want to commit, but I'm afraid I won't be able to do it. God gave me His life and daily grace and if I can't give these two things up for a time, how weak I am.

I'm a week in. I'm struggling today thinking about how much longer I have. It's kind of like running a marathon without training for it. It's something that seems impossible and in fact I know it is because I've tried on my own relying on will power and determination to give these things up and failed. My purpose is to give up these two things as a sacrifice. For me, this is a time of fasting, repentance, moderation, self reflection and worship. I've been disciplined to get up earlier, before 5 to devote more time to read Scripture, but I'm also trying let the Spirit lead rather than try to lead the Spirit. It would be typical for me to schedule time for worship and then get frustrated when the feelings weren't there. I've found myself worshiping in unusual places. The zumba instructor ended the class with "Overwhelmed" and yes, I worshiped in zumba class. I also felt led to read the Gospels.

I'm really thinking about adding these 2 things back into my life. It seems like giving them up has been very self centered. It's been good for me to give them up for a time because there was a lack of self control and a habitual dependence but I don't see how it's drawing me closer to God.  I have been getting up earlier to have more time for Scripture reading and I do feel like that is preparing me for Easter. I just finished reading the book of Matthew and I've been reading a lot of lent centered devotionals on line. 

I felt very frustrated and only lasted a week and a half. I feel like the disciples who couldn't even stay awake as Jesus prayed in the Garden. I still want to practice some form of Lent to prepare my heart for Easter, but I'm not sure how. I've been studying Acts and there were some Christian Jews who still participated in the Old Testament traditions after their conversion and it was okay for them to do it. In fact, being converted probably gave the traditions more meaning and they did it out of love, but they were considered weaker brothers because they needed them. I'm not sure what to take away from my experience.

Children in Heaven

Sometimes it makes me sad to think that there will be no babies and little children in Heaven not to say that babies and children don't go to Heaven when they die, but we will be ageless and there will be no marriage or reproduction. I believe that the things of this world are shadows of more perfect things to come. God loved to use object lessons in the Old Testament to prepare the people for Christ and the new covenant and when Jesus came He spoke in parables to teach the people of greater spiritual meaning. Marriage is a picture of Christ's relationship with the church. It's something earthly we can understand that points to something greater. Obviously, we have to have children so the human race doesn't die off, but we didn't have to have a loving, nurturing relationship with them. Why did God choose that for us? Maybe only to teach us more about His love for us. Maybe our children are a great object lesson. Imagine the relationship between God and Adam and Eve before the fall. Imagine how they walked and talked to each other and all the questions they had for their creator as He parented them. Quite often when new parents are asked what God has taught them with the arrival of their first baby they will say they understand God's love so much more. There is suffering to bring them life. There is sacrificial love. Children don't understand the extent of the love of the parents. It breaks the parents heart to correct the child, but the child sees it as cruel and unfair. Many of the decisions of the parents are based on the child's needs and wants. Parents love watching their children grow and experience new things. Parents love to give gifts and relish in the anticipation of giving them. There is so much that points to the love of Christ toward us. Imagine if we could love without selfishness, a double standard or regret. Imagine children who could understand the extent of our love with gratitude, humility and obedience. That's what the parent/ child relationship will be like in Heaven.

There is Always HOPE

It's easy to listen to the news and weep for the persecuted people in the world, to be overcome with grief, throw your hands up and pray for Jesus to come back and end it for good, to live in fear, wondering how much worse it will get, wondering when it will come to America, wondering if there is no hope.We live in a nation founded on Christianity with a leader who mocks it. I worry about my kids. What was I thinking? What kind of existence have I brought them into!   They have no idea of the horrific cruelty going on in this world that appears so safe to them. Often well meaning people will post things on social media to create awareness of the state of this world and I think in reality it creates more fear and hopelessness, at least it does for me. At times I awake in a near panic and have to pray myself back to sleep.

This is what God has been teaching me through all of this. I read that the Christian men from Egypt were asked to deny Christ before they were killed and they wouldn't. In fact, they died singing. God kept His promise. He gave them enough grace exactly when they needed it. Not to say they weren't afraid, but they knew in a matter of moments they would be with Christ and they died praising Him just like the Apostles- just like Stephen when he was being stoned to death while Paul stood by and watched.  They experienced the same strength by the same God. 

The Babylon captivity was a scary and seemingly hopeless time for the Jews. Do you know what Jeremiah told the fearful people? "The world is going to end. All hope is lost!" No, he told them to keep living life. He told them God has a hope and a future for them. 

Every time in the history of the world when Christians have been under persecution, more people turn to God. If these things were being done quietly they wouldn't have the impact that they are having. He can bring great good out of persecution. He's done it before. Where is our faith that He can do it again?

In a more personal way it has renewed my desire to point my kids toward Christ. I was getting lazy in that department and now I'm making it more of a priority. It has also given me opportunity to cry out to Jesus. It has driven me to Scripture and self examination.  He has reminded me that He has not given us this spirit of fear. He wants us to live with hope and endurance and faith. I don't think God wants us to throw in the towel and sit around waiting for Him to come back. He doesn't want us to preach doom and gloom to each other. He does want us to weep with those who weep and He wants us to be broken over sin, but He also wants us to lift each other up to do good works. God's not dead, and as of this moment, we have our religious freedom so seize the day!


"These are the words of the letter that Jeremiah the prophet sent from Jerusalem to the surviving elders of the exiles, and to the priests, the prophets, and all the people, whom Nebuchadnezzar had taken into exile from Jerusalem to Babylon......
  
     It said:  “Thus says the Lord of hosts, the God of Israel, to all the exiles whom I have sent into exile from Jerusalem to Babylon: Build houses and live in them; plant gardens and eat their produce.  Take wives and have sons and daughters; take wives for your sons, and give your daughters in marriage, that they may bear sons and daughters; multiply there, and do not decrease.  But seek the welfare of the city where I have sent you into exile, and pray to the Lord on its behalf, for in its welfare you will find your welfare.  For thus says the Lord of hosts, the God of Israel: Do not let your prophets and your diviners who are among you deceive you, and do not listen to the dreams that they dream,  for it is a lie that they are prophesying to you in my name; I did not send them, declares the Lord.

 “For thus says the Lord: When seventy years are completed for Babylon, I will visit you, and I will fulfill to you my promise and bring you back to this place. For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope. Then you will call upon me and come and pray to me, and I will hear you. You will seek me and find me, when you seek me with all your heart.  I will be found by you, declares the Lord, and I will restore your fortunes and gather you from all the nations and all the places where I have driven you, declares the Lord, and I will bring you back to the place from which I sent you into exile."

Thoughts on American Gods

I recently read Gaiman's book, "American Gods" .   It's about the ancient gods coming to America with the people that believed in them and they go to war with the modern gods such as technology, sex, money etc.  The ancient gods need people to continue to believe in them to stay "alive".  I thought is was a really interesting concept.  We tend to look down on these primitive people who worshiped gods in ancient times. "How foolish to worship a statue and sacrifice lives! We are a much more evolved people now." But, we aren't so different with our modern gods.

What about the god of food. This god fights for our attention. They all do. This god will show up on Pinterest in the form of recipes, at parties, when we're alone. This god comforts us, celebrates with us, keeps us company, helps us deal with stress.  Sometimes this god is delivered to us by a well meaning friend or co worker.  This god demands more and more until it consumes us.

 I watched the documentary, "Maxed Out" a couple years ago. It's about credit card debt. There were stories of people who committed suicide because they were so far in debt that felt there was no hope. They sacrificed their lives for the god of consumerism.

What about church? That's a good god to worship, right? You give your life over to the church. You get involved in everything you can. You are there whenever the doors are open unless you're sick, but sometimes even that won't keep you away.  Your children grow up and you find you don't really have a relationship with them. You realize you offered your children as a sacrifice to the god of church ministry.

 What if we worship our children? We pour our lives into them. We neglect our health- no time for exercise, sleep or eating what we should.  We grow up to find out we sacrificed our financial future, our strong, healthy bodies, our relationship with our spouse.  "How do we pay for retirement? Where did my health go? Where are the children?  Where are my friends?"

 I use these examples, but there are many gods- education, furthering our careers, the internet, sports. It's a battle for our lives. They promise to fulfill us and satisfy our desires, but they just want to consume us. They lie. If we stop worshiping them, they cease to exist. They let go. We're free.

We are all designed to worship. It's impossible for us not to worship something. Even Atheist worship a god of some form- perhaps humanity, ambition or life itself.We all live for something

There is only one God who doesn't go away when we stop believing. The God of the Bible is also demanding. He demands a perfect life and He demands justice. But in His grace He provided the perfect life in Himself to take our place. He understands our weakness. He still wants our life. He paid a great price for it, but He says, "Come to me all who are weary and I will give you rest." Above all, He commands us to love Him and love others. He is the only god who wants us to live a balanced life with all things in moderation, and in doing that, all other gods die.

Where do our thoughts wander? Where do we spend our money? Those are the modern gods who are fighting the hardest. Are they worth it?

I appreciated Gaiman's book because it made me think in a different way and brought the modern gods to life for me. I feel myself being pulled in different directions. I tend to get obsessive or over indulgent in one area of my life only to get that under control to become obsessive and over indulgent in another area. How do you escape when you feel a modern god pulling you in, taking over your life?  I don't recommend the book, "American Gods" to everyone due to some of the content, but I appreciated it because of the creativity and the depth. It made me think and that's what I'm looking for when I open a book.

Bitter November

It's Sanctity of Life Sunday, and here's my story.  About twelve years ago we were trying to adopt a baby.  My husband and I worked with a girl who made it her mission to find us one.  She went to school with a girl who found herself very unexpectedly pregnant so our friend, Brie gave her our adoption profile.  It was a booklet our adoption agency had us make with pictures and information about ourselves to give to birth moms to look through as they struggled to give their babies their best chance at life.  We knew that she received it and looked through all our pictures.  Unfortunately, Brie had to tell us that her friend decided to have an abortion. It was heart wrenching to know that it was going to happen and we were completely powerless to stop it.  This girl cheated on her boyfriend and got pregnant and she didn't want anyone to know, especially her boyfriend.  The abortion happened the day before Thanksgiving. I wonder if I'll meet this person in Heaven some day.  I wonder what I'll say.  Every year I quietly grieve this loss of life as we all gather together to eat our Thanksgiving meals. I wonder if anyone else grieves for this baby.  He or she would be about twelve now and could have been one of my own- my oldest, but instead....